Wherein I discuss matters I really ought not to mention, a simple and clean end to a saga, the death of a dastard, the breach of the streaming juggernaut, a trilogy that is now ethically free, and a perplexingly named zombie fiesta.
It’s no secret that I follow a lot of NSFW creators, mostly because a lot of the things I enjoy exist within NSFW places. However, something that always struck me as… odd about these communities is the creators who vocally and strongly discourage any minors from entering these places. Telling them to never look at their accounts, their works, or engage with NSFW content until they grow up enough to become real people.
I understand this principle, and I personally avoid minors whenever I can, as I do not want them to take in any bad influences from me. But when your job/hobby is creating things that people jerk off too… you need to be honest with yourself. NSFW and 18+ places position themselves as places only for adults, but that is not and never has been true. Because every teenager (meaning 90% of all teenagers with personal internet-accessible devices) has dabbled into these worlds while they were still minors.
There are always children in trench coats— in every sizable NSFW community in the world— and you want to know why that is? Because teenagers like to masturbate. When teenagers are going through puberty, they are throbbing with hormones and desperate to satiate them in some way. And, apropos of raping each other (minors cannot give consent, so all sex involving minors is rape), the best way to curb these urges is not to bottle them up. It is to let them out via the masturbation.
Now, minors can use a variety of subject matter to masturbate. Ranging from their own fantasies to photographs of attractive people wearing suggestive clothing. Yet most minors want to masturbate to things that contain nudity and remind them of sex. And where better to get that content other than via NSFW creators?
While I understand that NSFW creators do not want to interact with any minors— because that’s like a petroleum fueling station interacting with a box of matches— People in this field simply must be aware of the type of people who enjoy their creations. Especially when considering just how much NSFW content is clearly made for minors.
I am not referring to media that sexualizes media aimed at children, though that is something minors do seek out. I am talking about media that features a minor protagonist or central character, who is supposed to be a surrogate for the reader. Growing up, I read a LOT of erotically-charged stories about teenage protagonists that were clearly written by and for teenagers. And even to this day, I still stumble onto things that are clearly written with a minor audience in mind.
I guess what I am trying to say here is that… minors will always exist in NSFW spaces. Shooing them away is not going to actually do anything anyway, because they can still access your content via an alt account. Like it or not, minors are part of the NSFW world as both content creators and a target demographic. And I think there is nothing wrong with that. Let the kids lurk in the background, don’t pay them much mind, and they’ll grow up, eventually.
And as an NSFW content creator myself (most of my novels and short stories are for mature readers only), I have a recycled disclaimer that states that “this work is not suitable for minors.” I do not say this because I do not want minors to read my stuff. I do not care if they do or not. I say this, and use this particular language, because I want to convey that this work contains some mature themes and language.
This week was home to the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Final Presentation, where, after a 3.5 year hype cycle, the final newcomer to Super Smash Bros. Ultimate was revealed. Thus bringing an end to its prolonged development and support before its team either moves on, or is reassembled to work on the next Super Smash Bros. It has been a long and bizarre ride filled with… just so much terrible drama and relentless vile from Nintendo fans. But it resulted in what is inarguably one of the greatest fighting games of all time, and a glorious celebration of the (Japanese) video game industry. What, witht he title being is the most impressive crossover in the medium.
Anyway, things kicked off with some Mii Fighter costumes, revealing an Octoling from Splatoon, who really should have just been an echo fighter for the Inkling, but whatever. And more importantly, Doomguy. It is strange how people have latched onto Doom these past five years, with a resurgence around the original 1993 title, and and a surplus of fanfare existing around both 2016 revival and its 2020 sequel, Doom Eternal. Because of this, Doomguy, or to use his Christian name, Doom Slayer, was a popular candidate among western fans of Smash, and it is nice to see him get some representation.
As for the final fighter, the reveal was predictably atmospheric, intense, and had a grand cinematic presentation, before revealing the final fighter as… Sora from Kingdom Hearts.
Huh. I’m surprised Nintendo worked out a licensing agreement with this character, as he is owned by both Square Enix and Disney. So getting the rights to him, and getting approval to do anything with him, sounds like a logistical nightmare. However… here he is.
Sora was always a popular character in Smash polls, and because of the success and popularity of the Kingdom Hearts series, it only makes sense for him to get a spot, and with no major limitations. What with him coming with a full recreation of an environment from Kingdom Hearts I, which features artwork of other key Kingdom Hearts characters. However, there is not a speck of Disney in sight, and I’m actually quite grateful for that. I look at Disney characters the same way that normal people look at scat porn. They’re gross, and I want them to burn in a pyre.
Now, I would comment on how it is odd that, while Sora is coming to Smash, the entire Kingdom Hearts series still is not on Nintendo Switch. Even though the compilations could all definitely run on the system. But the presentation ended with the announcement that Kingdom Hearts 1.5+II.5 HD ReMIX, Kingdom Hearts II.8 HD Final Chapter Prologue, and Kingdom Hearts III are all coming to the Switch. …Where they will all be playable as online-only cloud titles.
I understand that porting games can be difficult, and I fully understand a game like Kingdom Hearts III being only available via cloud streaming. But the other games? No, that just does not make sense. The other games are HD renditions of games that ran on far weaker hardware, and the first two remix collections ran on the PS3. There is literally no good reason these are not coming to the Switch as offline versions. And the only reason I can think of why this is the case is because Square Enix does not want to put in the work of developing ports. Or in other words, they are just being lazy.
I was going to end this bit by talking about how momentous Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is, but… now I’m just mad at Square Enix… again.
I swear, Square Enix is neck and neck with Nintendo when it comes to ‘companies who make good games but find ways to continuously frustrate people.’ One of the more memorable instances of this was after the international release of Dragon Quest XI. The game was released for PS4 with a soundtrack full of MIDI compositions, instead of the orchestrated renditions from the Japanese version.
However, this was not the fault of Square Enix as much as it was the fault of Dragon Quest series composer, Koichi Sugiyama. Who supposedly prevented Square Enix from releasing orchestrated versions of Dragon Quest games outside of Japan for reasons that I do not understand. And when people were investigating why this was the case, they discovered that Sugiyama was a pretty shitty person. Sugiyama denied the copious amounts of heinous stuff Japan did throughout WWII, routinely promoted Japanese nationalism, and was a bigot all-around.
While I think his work is great, foundational, and iconic— like the Dragon Quest series as a whole. I was honestly hoping that he would die sooner than later so that his bigotty stink would not loom over the series. And on September 30th, at the ripe age of 90, Sugiyama passed away.
Now, the common schtick to play when someone dies is to treat it like a tragedy, but Sugiyama was an old man, he had great accomplishments, and I do not believe that he had any children. …So there really is nothing to be upset about. Like any other person, he lived, he died, and he lived well enough to leave something recognized by millions of people around the world. Honestly, I just hope that his estate does not fund any right-wing nationalist political groups so his death can be a happy thing in some sense of the word.
Moving on to some rather humiliating news… Twitch has been leaked. The source code for the streaming site was leaked via 4chan and spread via a torrent, and people have been hosting and reuploading the contents of this 128GB leak. This includes the source code for the website, which will allow people to find countless security vulnerabilities. Payout data from 2019, letting people know how much certain Twitch streamers made. User information, including usernames and passwords. Information on Vapor, an unreleased Steam competitor by Amazon. And many other things.
As for why this happened in the first place, the anonymous user behind this security breach claimed that they wanted to “foster more disruption and competition in the online video streaming space”. They specifically sought out Twitch as “their community is a disgusting toxic cesspool”. And while I know I should not condone the actions of someone who is leaking a lot of personal information… I actually completely agree with this person’s actions.
Now, I have never liked Twitch as a platform. I have never been big into streaming, as it urges people to stop being people and become part of this loud and thoughtless hivemind. Which makes it near-impossible to forge a culture that is anything more than a cesspit. And while Twitch has seen this coming for YEARS, they have failed to make due on their responsibility as a social media platform. If a billion-dollar corporation— scratch that— If an Amazon subsidiary cannot find the technology, funding, and drive to fix an issue like this, then I do not think they should exist. As they clearly are not using their power well, and are actively contributing to a rise in destructive behavior by perpetuating toxicity.
Aside from the whole preservation aspect, I see no value lost if Twitch as a platform were to disappear, and anything that could contribute to its downfall is something that I would openly encourage. Unfortunately, even with this unprecedented data leak, I can safely say that this will not be the death knell in the platform. The gaming streaming scene has shrunk, so there are only two major options: The online video monopoly of YouTube and Twitch. And sadly, I cannot see any competition ever making waves, let alone stealing Twitch’s top spot in this field. It sucks, but that’s how markets work.
Moving onto something less upsetting, Rockstar Games has followed-up on a leak from August by announcing Grand Theft Auto: The Trilogy – The Definitive Edition. A remastered compilation of 2001’s Grand Theft Auto III, 2002’s Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, and 2004’s Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. As the name implies, these titles will offer some enhancements over the original, but it is not clear what these will be, as Rockstar has released no gameplay, or even screenshots.
Instead, the only concrete details we have are that the game is coming out for PS5, PS4, Xbox Series, Xbox One, Switch, and PC in 2021, and will hit iOS and Android in 2022. …Oh, and within a week, Rockstar will delist all other versions of GTA III, Vice City, and San Andreas from digital storefronts. …Because they do not want people to buy the older versions, even though people have been modding and playing them for over 19 years at this point.
Now, even if these versions are the rare grade-A remasters that improve upon everything and can play just like the original, I will still take umbrage with this decision for one simple reason. The original versions of these games are touchstones that have affected the lives of millions, and Rockstar has a cultural obligation to make these original titles available for purchase. However… all three of these games have long-since been cracked, and it is easy to pirate them, so… I guess Rockstar is really just putting out the originals for free. Just like they did with the first two GTA games, except these need to be downloaded from third-party websites. Kinda weird, but I get it. Servers are expensive, especially for plucky upstarts like 2K Games.
Moving onto a re-release that is not destroying the legacy of the original, XSEED recently announced that they are putting out a new version of Corpse Party… which requires a bit of a history lesson to explain.
The original Corpse Party was a super primitive RPG Maker horror game that was released in 1996. While it was the origin of the series, the series in earnest did not truly begin until 2006’s Corpse Party: Blood Covered, an enhanced remake of the original game, which came out for Windows. The game was a cult hit and was later enhanced by MAGES into 2010’s Corpse Party: Blood Covered …Repeated Fear. Which offered new art, new voice acting, updated sprites, a better presentation, different music, and more side stories. That sounds simple, but things get tricky when viewing the localization history.
- In 2011, XSEED localized 2010’s Corpse Party: Blood Covered …Repeated Fear for PSP, but retitled the game to Corpse Party.
- In April 2016, XSEED released 2006’s Corpse Party: Blood Covered on PC, which confused many people, myself included, as they were putting out what was seen as an inferior version. And despite being a quantifiably different game than the PSP release, XSEED simply called this game Corpse Party.
- In October 2016, XSEED localized 2010’s Corpse Party: Blood Covered …Repeated Fear for 3DS, which was just baffling after the PC release 6 months earlier. And this game was also just called Corpse Party.
Now, in October 2021, XSEED is bringing over a port of 2010’s Corpse Party: Blood Covered …Repeated Fear for Switch and PS4, while also releasing the title for PC. And on all platforms, the title will be called Corpse Party (2021). Even though it is a port of a game from 2010.
This is all needlessly confusing— and I hate the naming scheme XSEED went with here— but… I said that I was talking about a publisher who was not destroying the legacy of the original. And XSEED is doing just that! Instead of delisting their 2016 PC release, they are leaving both available on Steam and GOG. Hell, they are even throwing in a permanent 25% discount for people who own one version, but want to purchase the other.
I consider this to be the way re-releases should be done. Keeping the original up and available for purchase— because it costs nothing for right holders to keep something up on a digital store (99% of the time)— and giving a discount to people who own the original version. It is a nice gesture, and I am happy that XSEED is putting in the effort to preserve their past work. Instead of throwing it away in order to sell a newer and more expensive version.
Also, I reviewed the 2016 PC release of Corpse Party and thought it was a pretty good time. I also played the visual novel side-sequel, Book of Shadows, but that one sucked and killed my interest in this series.
Header image comes from Did We Switch our Bodies After Having Sex by Tokinobutt. I tend to view all high-school-based student-led erotic fiction as being made for minors, as they have younger protagonists and are set in a setting that minors can easily relate to. Hence why I decided this header was “good enough” after five minutes of searching through the “La-Le-Lewd-Le-Lo”. Yes, I am such a degenerate that I named my hentai archive after a Metal Gear reference.
Anyway, pretty much everything you need to know about Did We Switch our Bodies After Having Sex by Tokinobutt is in the header image and name. An aggressive girl and a passive boy switch bodies when they have sex, and they live each others lives as a passive girl and aggressive boy for a while, while broadening their relationship. Normally, this would be nothing special, but the comic is 6 chapters long and the characters have enough room to breathe and interact with others, while undergoing some slight development. It’s pretty good if you are willing to read a TSF story that features drawings of underaged fictional characters having sex.